September was National Suicide Prevention month. The goal of these designations is to raise awareness of a problem that is far more frequent and misunderstood than most of us realize. We at Advanced Bio Treatment realize it because so many of our calls involve cleaning up the scene of a suicide. They are some of the most difficult calls we handle.
And the greatest tragedy is that suicide is 100% preventable.
While pain and grief accompany all deaths, the agony we witness at the scene of a suicide is different. Loved ones are often plagued with shock and guilt. Most sadly, they feel shamed and disgraced because even in the progressive 21st century, the stigmas attached to suicide, and to the depression and mental illness that likely caused the suicide, linger beneath the surface of a culture that still points a judgmental finger at suicide.
This quiet but unmistakable undercurrent marginalizes the death of a suicide victim by branding the victim “weak,” “crazy,” “selfish,” “theatrical,” or “cowardly.” Suicide victims and their loved ones do not garner the same compassion and understanding as victims of other kinds of deaths. These ignorant stigmas and stereotypes are exacerbated by popular-media portrayals of the mentally ill, which, according to the Huffington Post, are “either frightening or funny or both.”
We witnessed this lethal thinking at one especially terrible suicide scene that we were hired to clean. A young woman had suddenly stopped her car, gotten out, and jumped from an overpass onto the busy expressway below. She died instantly but left not only devastated family and friends but also numerous devastated drivers and passengers who witnessed the suicide and who were involved in a multi-car accident trying to avoid hitting her body.
We later overheard her employer tell a bystander, “Victoria was a drama queen. My guess is she was just trying to get attention from her boyfriend, who was driving with me in the car behind her, and then all of a sudden, uh-oh, woops! Took this a little too far! Didn’t mean for THAT to happen!”
Victoria, it turned out, had a long history of severe depression and mood disorders, and, like most suicide victims, she had threatened to take her life numerous times before she finally succeeded. She was 31.
Why don’t people who suffer depression and mental illness seek help? Often because they are stigmatized for life. They are ashamed and frightened. They often don’t have the support of family and friends. They convince themselves that they can handle the problem themselves. Other times, they simply don’t recognize that they have a problem.
According to the American Association of Suicidology,
- In 2014, 117 completed suicides took place every day, which translates into a completed suicide every 13 minutes and an attempt every 30 seconds.
- There are 25 attempts for every completed suicide.
- Nationally, 42,773 took their own lives in 2014.
- Suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death among young people ages 25-34 and the 10th leading cause of death overall, with homicide following in a distant 17th
- Since 2004, the suicide rates among all age groups has steadily increased.
Of these suicides, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, “22 veterans and one service member take their lives each day.”
Horrifying statistics.
What can you do?
Recognize the prevailing signs of someone at risk of taking his or her own life:
- Talking or writing about ending one’s life.
- Threatening suicide.
- Attempting suicide.
- Feeling hopeless and trapped.
- Collecting weapons like pills, knives, or guns.
- Exhibiting self-destructive behavior like using drugs, drinking excessively, or taking reckless risks.
- Withdrawing from family and friends, isolation.
Intervene:
- Don’t be afraid to ask the person if he or she is suicidal. You can’t “put the idea in someone’s head” or make a non-suicidal person suicidal.
- Listen without giving advice or judging.
- Show compassion and concern.
- Let the person know he or she is not alone.
- Check in on the person. Don’t wait for the person to ask for company or help.
- Encourage positive life changes, such as exercise, nutrition, sufficient sleep.
- Offer to assist the person in getting help.
- Call a crisis center or 911 if suicide seems imminent.
- NEVER blame yourself.
- NEVER argue or try to persuade the person that he or she “has so much to live for.” Just like you can’t put the notion of suicide in someone’s head, you can’t talk a person out of it, either.
- NEVER promise confidentiality. Remember that a life is at stake.
- NEVER act shocked, pass judgment, or try to make the person feel guilty with statements like “this will devastate your children.”
If you or someone you know has thoughts of suicide, please don’t wait. Help is available 24 hours every day, every day of the year. We have listed several good resources at the bottom of this article.
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255.
We are Advanced Bio Treatment, and we care about the communities we serve. We want to help you protect yourself and those you love. Should you need our services, please call us at 800-295-1684. We give free quotes, provide emergency services, work with your insurance company, and respond 24/7/365.
Our Sources and Resources for You
