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Forms of Domestic Abuse: It’s Not Just Physical

Often, when people think of domestic abuse, they think of physical abuse, and for this reason, victims of other equally traumatic and destructive forms of domestic abuse often don’t seek help. It’s important to identify the types of domestic abuse to know where to get help for domestic violence, and to be aware of the many resources for domestic abuse and domestic violence victims. Over 33% of women and 25% of men in the United States have experienced some form of domestic violence.

It is critical that domestic abuse victims understand:

  • You are NOT alone.
  • It is NEVER your fault.
  • You are NEVER to blame for your partner’s behavior.
  • You do NOT deserve the abuse.
  • There ARE people and organizations waiting to help you.
  • There ARE safe, effective resources to help you escape from or transition away from the abuse.
  • Your partner is NOT going to change because you stay with him or her. The abuser is less likely to change when the abusive behavior is reinforced by your acceptance of it.

5 Types of Domestic Abuse

Domestic abuse is about two things: power and control. The key elements of domestic abuse are: intimidation, humiliation, and injury.

Essentially abusers “mix and match” 5 types of domestic abuse to achieve this power and control:

1. Sexual abuse in which your partner forces you to engage in sex or specific sexual acts, withholds sex, or ignores your sexual feelings and desires.

2. Emotional / psychological abuse, which can be verbal or non-verbal and includes threats against you, your friends, or your family. Such as:

  • Name-calling
  • Belittling
  • Making all your decisions for you
  • Withholding affection
  • Isolating you from family and friends
  • Restricting access to phones and computers
  • Accusations
  • Extreme jealousy

3. Physical abuse, which could include hitting, beating, and punching, pushing, shoving, choking, biting, pulling hair, and prohibiting access to medical attention.

4. Financial abuse includes withholding funds, stealing, identity theft, creating  financial dependence, forcing you to work, forbidding to work, and financial control.

5. Spiritual abuse includes forbidding you to practice your own moral, cultural, or religious beliefs or forcing you to give up some or all of your values.

 

Get Help for Violent Domestic Abuse

Once you recognize what domestic abuse is, the next step is to know where to get help for domestic violence. At the end of this article, we list many good resources for domestic violence victims, including explanations of what domestic abuse is, why abusers abuse, and where to get help. If you are a victim or someone you know is a victim, please keep these resources handy and pass them along to the victim.

If you’re unsure whether a situation constitutes domestic abuse or you’re unsure what to do, the National Domestic Violence Hotline staffs advocates who can talk to you 24/7 about your relationship and who can point you to helpful resources. 1-800-799-7233.

Domestic Abuse Safety Tips

Until you are comfortable making the decision to leave your abuser, here are some safety tips that may help you make a safe and quick escape:

  • Consider purchasing a pre-paid cell phone that your abuser knows nothing about so that your abuser has no record of phone numbers you have called.
  • If you use a cell phone to which the abuser has access, turn off the GPS and auto answer so that your abuser cannot track you.
  • Always use a safe computer outside your home if you seek information or help online or if you communicate with anyone online about the abuse.
  • Change your user names and passwords for all your private, sensitive information.
  • Be aware of the precursors to your abuser’s violence. Know what the signs of an explosion are and be ready with plausible reasons to leave the house.
  • Have a code word or signal that lets you communicate with neighbors, friends, and family that you’re in trouble and the police should be called.
  • Make sure you always have a full tank of gas.
  • Always leave the driver’s door of your car unlocked.
  • Always park your car so that you can drive straight out, rather than back out, of the driveway.
  • Leave a key hidden in the car or in another safe place that you can get to quickly.
  • Have cash, clothes, phone numbers, and important documents hidden in a safe, accessible place such as a friend’s home.
  • Practice getting out quickly, and have your children practice with you.
  • Memorize phone numbers of people with whom you can stay and who can help you.
  • Memorize the numbers of the local battered women’s shelter and National Domestic Violence Hotline.

We are Advanced Bio Treatment. We are here for you 24 hours every day of the year, and we take emergency calls and work with your insurance company. Should you need our services, please call us at 800-295-1684.

Resources for Domestic Violence Victims

http://www.weaveinc.org/

http://www.thehotline.org/

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/fysb/resource/help-fv

https://www.domesticshelters.org/?gclid=CP3h45Db5cgCFYI8gQodRb8C-w

 

 

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Ted Pelot Owner & President of Crime Scene Cleanup Company - Advanced Bio-Treatment